Wednesday, 2 May 2012
  • Many of my sentences start with "Back in the day..", or "These days...."  - this is usually in response to younger people saying something about how ridiculous something now is, eg, the amount of health and safety, or moaning about being bored, having lots of housework to do etc.
  • I can't stand other peoples kids!  - actually I think they are lovely as long as I can't hear them or they in any way impinge on my own equilibrium.  Having gone from being able to zone out 3 kids whilst I studied for nursing finals, the mere whimper from a child is now enough to send me into spasms. That said I do love listening to them play outside, love their little cute ways and feel weepy when they do sweet things like sing in choirs but don't tell anyone.
  • I blame everything on "my age" - from aches and pains, to forgetting something, to bad periods, feeling hot or being grumpy.  It's all down to "Me age".
  • Conversations with similarly aged friends always include an account of our latest ailment or a moan about something that seems to be prevalent "these days".  Usually followed by blissful reminiscing about the 1970s.
  • I get excited about the possibility of buying a shed.
  • I still think that 1976 was "the best summer ever".
  • I bitch much more. My "live and let live" attitude has developed into a "live my way or die".  Other drivers, inconsiderate neighbours, loud music, or a constantly barking dog will all send me into a paroxysm of wrath. 
  • Although happy to continue my usual activities eg, camping in a muddy field for 10 days at Glastonbury Festival there is usually a point where I say "I'm getting too old for this sh*t".  Usually when I am stuck up to my knees in mud at 3am on the way to the toilet.
  • I sigh loudly at the sight of some of what passes for fashion "nowadays".  Call me old fashioned (please) but looking like either an American criminal advertising for bum sex/a harlot just isn't that attractive. 

Of course the plus side of getting is older is I don't care what other people think of me, I don't get asked for ID, I never have to worry about getting wrinkles because I already have them, and grey hair?  ffft.  That's what hair dye is for!  Now, where's my slippers...

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Mara Cortesi
Live and work in Somerset. Just about to embark on a back to nursing practice course.
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