Showing posts with label facebook. Show all posts
Showing posts with label facebook. Show all posts
Thursday, 26 January 2012
This blog is about issues of online privacy when using social networking sites like Facebook. However, it can equally apply to discussion forums or content that is put up anywhere online.
What Facebook and online forums give us is the opportunity to vent immediately over things that we feel strongly about and we post whilst we are vulnerable/angry/desparate/drunk and so on. It takes away the time we used to spend mulling things over and thinking before speaking. Most of us will fall foul of this from time to time. We have all seen people post negative remarks or comments about work colleagues, their boss, friends, lovers, and details of their personal life.
The first thing to bear in mind is that when you are posting on facebook is that you are essentially posting publicly to the internet regardless of the security settings you choose on each post. This information is freely available to you within the Facebook Help Centre, if you know where to look and are prepared to dig far enough.
"I have custom privacy settings" is an oft-used phrase regarding facebook privacy, and it is really just lulling you into a false sense of security.
In a nutshell what the privacy centre on Facebook tells you is that:
Setting the initial post/note or status update to "friends only" will not prevent people who are not your friends from seeing what you post on Facebook. If anyone clicks "share" you instantly lose control over who can see your original post. The control over visibility passes to the person who displays that content on their page via sharing. Even blocking a person by name will not save you if they are friends with someone who subsequently share the original post.
So how does this happen in reality? In many ways, for example:
You post a status and set your privacy as "friends only".
Someone on your wall clicks "share". Now all their friends can see it too.
Not only can they see it, they can also click "share" and so on.
One person shares but their privacy is set to public. Now it's out there for anyone to see.
Combine this to the fact that anyone can at any time change the privacy setting on their own "share" from "friends only" to "public" and it is easy to see how your information, personal facts, comments, photos, and posts can easily permeate through and become visible world wide.
Pretty soon it is all over the place - this is often referred to "going viral" when applied to blogs, videos and so on. Which gives some indication of the speed and distance things can spread very quickly in a short period of time.
Of course you can see if a post has been shared but not who has shared it. Once it has been shared, it can be shared on again and again, and you would have no idea of how many times the post has moved on.
Always remember that a Facebook "friend" is not necessarily someone who will act in a way associated with real life friendship. If you do not know them in real life consider the word "contact" as a more accurate assessment of their role on your page. It may change your perception enough to stop and consider your posts more carefully.
The other thing to recognise is that people can and do do is take a photograph of the screen (known as "screen capture" or "screenshots") which then provides an image of your blog/website/note or post. This can then be saved and/or printed, attached to emails or posted up on other websites and forums and widely distributed online. I have known people get presented with screenshots of inappropriate posts and conversations on their arrival at work the following day.
If you think I am exagerrating take a trip to the website Failbook. You will see thousands upon thousands of statuses, images, notes, pictures and so on that have been photographed and shared in this way and then float about for all eternity in the ether. Of course they give us all a good laugh - until we end up on the receiving end of it through an ill-conceived post.
So what happens if the worse comes to the worst and you end up with your inner rants out there online for all to see?
First, remove the original post. It may seem like bolting the stable door after the horse has bolted but it is still good for damage limitation. Once deleted the post should disappear from view even if shared. It won't get rid of screenshots that arrive in failbook or on your boss' desk but it does show a willingness to accept and rectify the problem, and lends weight to any apologies you may need to make. It also prevents new comments being added later only to resurrect the issue, and it gives the post a chance to disappear into the distant internet memory vaults. Out of sight out of mind.
If your post was about a person or company and it has been seen things can get tricky. Many of us have seen the above image and it is all very amusing to everyone except the person who posted it. Your first port of call, after you have removed the offending article or post is to accept that the responsibility for the situation is yours and to apologise to the people involved. Do not try to blame the victim, the sharer(s), Facebook or the booze. You posted it, and unless you were being forced at gun point, there really is no one or nothing else you can legitamately blame. Accept that perhaps a social networking site was probably not the best forum to discuss your issues. If necessary apologise publicly in the place you originally put the post. Once that is done, let the matter lie, and whatever you do do not get dragged into discussing it any further online: even if you think things could not get any worse. They can.
If you put something personal on your status, which you are happy to share and receive upsetting remarks remember you not have to put up with this!! Simply delete the offending posts, and if they persist then delete them as friends and block them. People who are probably quite meek in real life can become the most appalling bullies once they get behind a computer screen! If it upsets you, get rid.
In conclusion:
When posting anywhere on line it is worth remembering that:
And most of all ALWAYS remember this:
What Facebook and online forums give us is the opportunity to vent immediately over things that we feel strongly about and we post whilst we are vulnerable/angry/desparate/drunk and so on. It takes away the time we used to spend mulling things over and thinking before speaking. Most of us will fall foul of this from time to time. We have all seen people post negative remarks or comments about work colleagues, their boss, friends, lovers, and details of their personal life.
The first thing to bear in mind is that when you are posting on facebook is that you are essentially posting publicly to the internet regardless of the security settings you choose on each post. This information is freely available to you within the Facebook Help Centre, if you know where to look and are prepared to dig far enough.
"I have custom privacy settings" is an oft-used phrase regarding facebook privacy, and it is really just lulling you into a false sense of security.
In a nutshell what the privacy centre on Facebook tells you is that:
Setting the initial post/note or status update to "friends only" will not prevent people who are not your friends from seeing what you post on Facebook. If anyone clicks "share" you instantly lose control over who can see your original post. The control over visibility passes to the person who displays that content on their page via sharing. Even blocking a person by name will not save you if they are friends with someone who subsequently share the original post.
So how does this happen in reality? In many ways, for example:
You post a status and set your privacy as "friends only".
Someone on your wall clicks "share". Now all their friends can see it too.
Not only can they see it, they can also click "share" and so on.
One person shares but their privacy is set to public. Now it's out there for anyone to see.
Combine this to the fact that anyone can at any time change the privacy setting on their own "share" from "friends only" to "public" and it is easy to see how your information, personal facts, comments, photos, and posts can easily permeate through and become visible world wide.
Pretty soon it is all over the place - this is often referred to "going viral" when applied to blogs, videos and so on. Which gives some indication of the speed and distance things can spread very quickly in a short period of time.
Of course you can see if a post has been shared but not who has shared it. Once it has been shared, it can be shared on again and again, and you would have no idea of how many times the post has moved on.
Always remember that a Facebook "friend" is not necessarily someone who will act in a way associated with real life friendship. If you do not know them in real life consider the word "contact" as a more accurate assessment of their role on your page. It may change your perception enough to stop and consider your posts more carefully.
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| We have all seen posts like these on Facebook. |
The other thing to recognise is that people can and do do is take a photograph of the screen (known as "screen capture" or "screenshots") which then provides an image of your blog/website/note or post. This can then be saved and/or printed, attached to emails or posted up on other websites and forums and widely distributed online. I have known people get presented with screenshots of inappropriate posts and conversations on their arrival at work the following day.
If you think I am exagerrating take a trip to the website Failbook. You will see thousands upon thousands of statuses, images, notes, pictures and so on that have been photographed and shared in this way and then float about for all eternity in the ether. Of course they give us all a good laugh - until we end up on the receiving end of it through an ill-conceived post.
So what happens if the worse comes to the worst and you end up with your inner rants out there online for all to see?
First, remove the original post. It may seem like bolting the stable door after the horse has bolted but it is still good for damage limitation. Once deleted the post should disappear from view even if shared. It won't get rid of screenshots that arrive in failbook or on your boss' desk but it does show a willingness to accept and rectify the problem, and lends weight to any apologies you may need to make. It also prevents new comments being added later only to resurrect the issue, and it gives the post a chance to disappear into the distant internet memory vaults. Out of sight out of mind.
If your post was about a person or company and it has been seen things can get tricky. Many of us have seen the above image and it is all very amusing to everyone except the person who posted it. Your first port of call, after you have removed the offending article or post is to accept that the responsibility for the situation is yours and to apologise to the people involved. Do not try to blame the victim, the sharer(s), Facebook or the booze. You posted it, and unless you were being forced at gun point, there really is no one or nothing else you can legitamately blame. Accept that perhaps a social networking site was probably not the best forum to discuss your issues. If necessary apologise publicly in the place you originally put the post. Once that is done, let the matter lie, and whatever you do do not get dragged into discussing it any further online: even if you think things could not get any worse. They can.
If you put something personal on your status, which you are happy to share and receive upsetting remarks remember you not have to put up with this!! Simply delete the offending posts, and if they persist then delete them as friends and block them. People who are probably quite meek in real life can become the most appalling bullies once they get behind a computer screen! If it upsets you, get rid.
In conclusion:
When posting anywhere on line it is worth remembering that:
- People on facebook and online forums are often strangers and are not real friends.
- Some people are not very nice.
- Some people will use any opportunity to pick a fight on any issue (internet trolls).
And most of all ALWAYS remember this:
- Personal information that you do not want to become public knowledge should never be posted anywhere on Facebook.
- If you would not discuss this with a friend in a pub full of strangers or anywhere it could be overhead then do not put it on facebook.
Friday, 12 August 2011
I have taken to picking my posts/status updates/comments to pieces before I post because someone, somewhere always either takes offense or gets the wrong end of the stick. If you too are sick of trying to protect everyone else's feelings as well as your own and you never want to risk offending anyone ever again, or indeed risk becoming the victim of an online troll, you will need to learn to avoid certain "high risk" subjects:
Animal Rights
Any link, comment or question on this subject is likely to produce defensive comments and even aggressive ones. If you call into question any element of hypocrisy relating to people who participate in certain activities in the name of animal rights it is tantamount to saying that all said organisations are bad, that animal protection is bad and that you want to torture harmless puppies, bunnies and kittens. No matter how much you may feel that animal protection and rescue is great, no matter how many times you repeat yourself and even if you support or even run a rescue yourself, you will never convince your attackers that you didnt go the the KFC School of Animal Husbandry and are therefore an evil bastard who runs a battery farm and should be hung by their nipples from the nearest tree.
Meat Eating/Vegetarianism/Veganism/Raw Eating/Any Dietary Choices
Unless you are actually undertaking a type of diet in the area on which you wish to comment, it will automatically be assumed that any link you post is a veiled or even an overt attack on someone else's lifestyle choice. Even if you believe strongly in your cause that all meat is murder or a vegan diet is odd and may be bad for you, you must remain silent or risk social network suicide. In fact even the most innocuous links should be avoided. Do not even consider posting something that you feel anyone in a dietary/lifestyle group that is in anyway different to your own would find interesting or informative. It can be seen as patronising or even as a form of attack. Once they get defensive you will then feel oblicated to waste your life trying to explain something is actually completely self-explanatory.
Race
Even if you are trying to point out something perfectly reasonable, be aware that you could get accused of racism at any time. This applies equally to ALL races.. Avoid any statements relating to your own race, or others, or any opinion of yours which may be seen to be racially biased. The safest course of action is to keep completely silent and convince yourself that everyone is completely pure of thought and no one ever makes a racist remark, tells an improper joke, holds a racist stereotype view of anyone or in any way, shape or form dislikes or makes assumptions about anyone simply on the basis that their skin may be a different colour. It's much safer that way. This can equally be applied to nationality, gender, sexuality, etc. In fact any aspect of human behaviour. So if you can possibly resist try not to comment on anything at all.
Religion
Another hot potato best avoided. How can a non-christian/jew/muslim/hindu/buddhist/pagan possibly have anything to say on anyone else's religion? We are best not trying to understand others by asking questions, because someone somewhere is going to get on the defensive and assume you are ridiculing/undermining their whole belief system.
Be aware that someone may hold theories on a number of religious based subjects themselves, eg, they may consider that it is likely they descended from Aliens but ridicule the existence of a God or Goddess. Therefore, if you say anything at all about your own religion they are just as likely to discount it as rubbish as anyone else. Silence is the best option here.
Politics/Current Affairs
You don't want to get accused of being left/right wing, towing the party line, etc by expressing an opinion. People get very upset if others question their viewpoint let alone openly disagreeing with it and this will lead to upset and social networking unpopularity, with of course the threat of the ultimate sanction: that of being being blocked and deleted. Best to just agree with everyone about everything. Or say nothing in case you get accused of being one of the "sheeple".
The Environment
Never mention renewable energy, the risk here is that you will be accused of being a left wing tree hugging hippy. Someone will invariably point out that you are typing on a mass produced computer, which is probably non-recyclable and using electricity which is likely generated via fossil fuel/oil or nuclear power plants, you will get upset and it will all go terribly wrong.
Never question anyone who is protesting on anything enviornment related. If the campaign is in favour of nuclear energy see my previous comment on being called a tree-hugger, if it is against nuclear power expect to be lambasted as if you are personally producing CFC containing aerosols and burning non-smokeless fossil fuels on a world widescale whilst simultaneously bulldozing the rainforest.
Never ask about alternatives to what they are protesting against most people do not know, or have not bothered to investigate if there actually is one. So don't risk bruising their sensibilities with difficult questions. It's just not the decent thing to do.
Other Countries
Never, ever, postulate about possible solutions to problems in other countries. Not only are you going to be told you are wrong and risk hurt feelings you are also likely to be branded either a) racist or b) an imperialist oppressor (possibly both) or conversely c) a bleeding heart liberal.
Never use the word "terrorism" in a post - remember 'one man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter' and you would not wish to ever offend anyone, that would be bad. Also any suggestion of "International Aid" is something that will get you into a lot of trouble. If you cannot help but empathise with the plight of others never suggest that we send them any financial aid whatsoever. It will only lead to social networking heartache.
So in conclusion: to avoid offence on social networking sites you should try to remember that you do not actually know half of your "online friends", you are not down the pub having a good natured, face-to-face banter like you would have been back in the "good old days" when you could get your meaning across by tone of voice etc and above all:-
Animal Rights
Meat Eating/Vegetarianism/Veganism/Raw Eating/Any Dietary Choices
Race
Religion
Be aware that someone may hold theories on a number of religious based subjects themselves, eg, they may consider that it is likely they descended from Aliens but ridicule the existence of a God or Goddess. Therefore, if you say anything at all about your own religion they are just as likely to discount it as rubbish as anyone else. Silence is the best option here.
Politics/Current Affairs
You don't want to get accused of being left/right wing, towing the party line, etc by expressing an opinion. People get very upset if others question their viewpoint let alone openly disagreeing with it and this will lead to upset and social networking unpopularity, with of course the threat of the ultimate sanction: that of being being blocked and deleted. Best to just agree with everyone about everything. Or say nothing in case you get accused of being one of the "sheeple".
The Environment
Never question anyone who is protesting on anything enviornment related. If the campaign is in favour of nuclear energy see my previous comment on being called a tree-hugger, if it is against nuclear power expect to be lambasted as if you are personally producing CFC containing aerosols and burning non-smokeless fossil fuels on a world widescale whilst simultaneously bulldozing the rainforest.
Never ask about alternatives to what they are protesting against most people do not know, or have not bothered to investigate if there actually is one. So don't risk bruising their sensibilities with difficult questions. It's just not the decent thing to do.
Other Countries
Never, ever, postulate about possible solutions to problems in other countries. Not only are you going to be told you are wrong and risk hurt feelings you are also likely to be branded either a) racist or b) an imperialist oppressor (possibly both) or conversely c) a bleeding heart liberal.
Never use the word "terrorism" in a post - remember 'one man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter' and you would not wish to ever offend anyone, that would be bad. Also any suggestion of "International Aid" is something that will get you into a lot of trouble. If you cannot help but empathise with the plight of others never suggest that we send them any financial aid whatsoever. It will only lead to social networking heartache.
So in conclusion: to avoid offence on social networking sites you should try to remember that you do not actually know half of your "online friends", you are not down the pub having a good natured, face-to-face banter like you would have been back in the "good old days" when you could get your meaning across by tone of voice etc and above all:-
- Never express your own opinion
- Never comment on other people's opinions
Saturday, 16 July 2011
Easiest ways of making an idiot of yourself on Facebook:
My personal favourite - Posting when Emotional/Drunk
Posting when drunk is a really, really bad idea, but one that many of us, myself included, is guilty of from time to time. There is nothing worse than waking up the morning after to read something that sounded really funny in your head at 2am after a bottle of wine, only to realise how totally cringe-making it actually is. It can also lead on to the following horrendous situations!!
Over-Reacting to People's Posts
If you post it for public comment you cannot really complain if people comment on it and people do not always view things the same. If they get offensive just delete their comments. Simples. Discussion is all part of the rich fabric of life. And if someone posts something you disagree with just keep it sane. As someone who has been a victim of aggressive attacks over a pretty inoffensive little video, there is nothing quite as gratifying as bumping into someone in town who has completely over-reacted to something on Facebook only to feel like a complete arse once they had calmed down/sobered up. Watching a grown man blush and pretend they haven't seen you is the nectar of the Gods!!
Slagging off your Boss/Work Colleagues
This is an obvious no-no. For a start you could end up getting the sack and this isn't necessarily the worst case scenario. You could end up working somewhere and finding that everyone dislikes you intensely. Definitely not pleasant. Generic bitching about work is fine, but if you start slagging off individuals and you actually need the job you may want to rethink! Someone always knows someone who knows someone who may know exactly who you are talking about!! And obviously no one would be idiotic enough to do this if their boss is actually on Facebook would they?
Washing your Dirty Laundry in Public (Or even worse someone else's!)
No one really wants to know that you think your other half is a complete wanker/bitch. If that's the case then either move on or shut up. You may well be all loved up again tomorrow however, the reputation of your other half is going to take a bashing and it may affect people's wish to socialise with them (and you) in the future.
Similarly if someone tells you something about their relationship problems they really don't want cryptic remarks on your status or responses to theirs that gives the game away and possibly more information than they want in the public domain.
Relationship-related Statuses
We don't need to know how much you love each other every second of every day. Repeated gushing saccharin statuses are incredibly boring. You will end up with your feed hidden, or even worse, people will just define you in terms of your relationship. There is nothing worse than being one-dimensional. Also, you are going to feel like a complete idiot if it all goes tits up later! The odd romantic post is great, but if it's every 2nd or 3rd status your audience will probably go into a coma through sugar overload!
No one wants to know if you have had/or are planning to have some sack time with the love of your life. As far as we are all concerned you are like action man/Barbie in the genitals department and images of you making the beast with 2 backs are not required. And we especially do not want you colouring them in!
My personal favourite - Posting when Emotional/Drunk
Posting when drunk is a really, really bad idea, but one that many of us, myself included, is guilty of from time to time. There is nothing worse than waking up the morning after to read something that sounded really funny in your head at 2am after a bottle of wine, only to realise how totally cringe-making it actually is. It can also lead on to the following horrendous situations!!
Over-Reacting to People's Posts
Slagging off your Boss/Work Colleagues
Washing your Dirty Laundry in Public (Or even worse someone else's!)
Similarly if someone tells you something about their relationship problems they really don't want cryptic remarks on your status or responses to theirs that gives the game away and possibly more information than they want in the public domain.
Relationship-related Statuses
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| Add caption |
No one wants to know if you have had/or are planning to have some sack time with the love of your life. As far as we are all concerned you are like action man/Barbie in the genitals department and images of you making the beast with 2 backs are not required. And we especially do not want you colouring them in!
Tuesday, 12 July 2011
At the present time you can choose from a grand total of 10 relationship statuses on the popular social networking site Facebook. But how on earth can one choose? Read my brief guide to help you make one of the most important social networking decisions of your life!
Single, Engaged, Married, Divorced, Widowed and in a Civil Partnership. These mean what we all know they mean. But what if we do not neatly fit into these nice pigeon holes that Facebook has designed for us? Fear not!! You have more choices!!
Separated - may mean what it says, can also mean "really I'm married but I fancy a bit on the side".
In a Relationship - long term,(probably) monogomous relationship with a person of indeterminant gender. Possibly cohabiting. Unlike "married" and "civil partnership" this will not simultaneously inform your audience as to the nature of your sexuality. To be fair this "outing" is not really Facebook's fault but rather the fault of a society that sees marriage between 2 people of the same sex and that between a man and a woman as somehow different. But I digress.
The 2 other relationship statuses on offer are: "in an open relationship" and "it's complicated". These are a bit more ambiguous in their meaning.
Open Relationship as a status should NEVER be taken at face value. A genuine open relationship is by mutual agreement. However in the parameters of Facebook (and in my experience also in real life!) you can never really know if this is the case or if it is just one person agreeing that the other can shag around in the vain hope that they won't. So if you start facebook flirting and/or end up forming some sort of primarily sexual relationship with someone who claims to be in an "open relationship" you could still end up getting your head kicked in by their significant other. Be warned.
My favourite status of all time has to be "It's Complicated" - What the hell does that mean? How complicated can it be? Either you are in a relationship or you are not!! Some relationships really are too complicated to explain easily in a one word status, but most actually aren't. For the sake of argument lets look at some potential meanings to this intriguing relationship status:
Wasn't life so much simpler when you either ticked married or single in a box?
Separated - may mean what it says, can also mean "really I'm married but I fancy a bit on the side".
In a Relationship - long term,(probably) monogomous relationship with a person of indeterminant gender. Possibly cohabiting. Unlike "married" and "civil partnership" this will not simultaneously inform your audience as to the nature of your sexuality. To be fair this "outing" is not really Facebook's fault but rather the fault of a society that sees marriage between 2 people of the same sex and that between a man and a woman as somehow different. But I digress.
The 2 other relationship statuses on offer are: "in an open relationship" and "it's complicated". These are a bit more ambiguous in their meaning.
My favourite status of all time has to be "It's Complicated" - What the hell does that mean? How complicated can it be? Either you are in a relationship or you are not!! Some relationships really are too complicated to explain easily in a one word status, but most actually aren't. For the sake of argument lets look at some potential meanings to this intriguing relationship status:
- I am polyamorous (not to be confused with infidelity or promiscuity)
- I have a couple on the go and like to keep my options open
- One or both parties are married or in a relationship elsewhere
- One or both parties is committment phobic
- We live miles apart a or there are other logistical issues making the relationship more complex that usual
- I want to be monogomous but my partner doesn't and I am hanging around waiting for them to change their mind. (And vice versa).
- I am married/in a relationship but my significant other "doesn't understand me"
- I have a "friends with benefits" arrangement.
- Do not rule out simple attention seeking behaviour on this one.
Wasn't life so much simpler when you either ticked married or single in a box?
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About Me
- Mara Cortesi
- Live and work in Somerset. Just about to embark on a back to nursing practice course.